Letting go

I had a terrible morning fretting over spars. I mixed up our spar dates with HCI, and I went completely crazed with worry over arrangements made in advance. Then I realised the actual spar date clashes with History makeup. But that can be easily resolved...

You know what, I'm beginning to accept that I'm neurotic. Now I sound like one of those silly urban Americans who spend half their time visiting their shrinks. I can't help it. I'm a control freak, and when things get out of my control, I can't stop obsessing over them. So I guess my neurosis stems from a controlling nature. I guess I need to learn how to let go. What an outcome. That's a day's work of psychoanalysis done...

Some people find it so amusing when I roll my eyes. I wonder when I learned to. I don't think it's a good habit. Reeks of bitchiness. Oh, but it does help to make a point, visually.

I just realised why I feel so comfortable writing. That's when I'm in full control over what I say. My thoughts can be crafted to fit the occassion as I want them to, without outside interference. I guess writing, and in this case blogging, is a kind of stress reliever. How funny.

I have no idea how the rest of the day is going to turn out. I'm going to pray and trust God. I was reminded today that worry is a sin. Most people don't realise that, but essentially worry means you don't trust God. That's food for thought, because in my case I worry very frequently.